The urge is strong to take them out

Okay, locks or loose hair. The advantage of locks is that I don't have to comb my hair. I don't like combing it. But right now, I don't like how it looks. With loose hair, I like the styles that I do (when I feel like doing them), but most of the time I don't do them. Also, my hair is damaged from impatiently pulling the comb through my hair. If I take out the baby locks, will I regret it later? Probably. I always come back to locks, because I want low maintenance long hair, and that's the only way I see that happening. The last few times I've combed out starter locks, I was tired of my hair by the time I finished combing them out. Then I would wear an afro for a few days, then put my hair back up in braids or twists for starter locks. I never did the cute styles I like (beside the afro or puff). With locks I wash, condition, towel dry, and separate. With loose hair I shampoo, condition, towel dry, detangle, moisturize, and style. That detangling and styling takes way too much time.

So what about me not liking how my hair looks. It's just that my hair is so different than what I'm used to. I love how mature locks look, but my hair is not mature. It's just like tangled matted hair at the ends, and the rest is an uncombed afro. I mean, it's exciting that my hair is locking, but this fro with locks floating on top look is not working for me. A couple of times when I went out somewhere, I put a scarf on, and that looked cute. But doing that seems like it would slow the process in the front, because after I take the scarf off, my hair in the front looks much straighter and stretched out. So that's out except for special occasions. How about tams and/or headwraps for those days? That could work. Naani has some hats I like.

You know what, though? I do love how my hair feels. And I like seeing the locks develop. I just have to keep visualizing the end result that I want. And hide my hair from myself when I am not feeling it.

Still freeforming and the kid

Well, I'm still locking. And given my history, I think that's something. Although I have had some major urges to comb my hair out, and start over with braids or twists. I just remind myself why I wanted to lock my hair this way, and look at freeform pictures and blogs to visualize the outcome that I want, and then I'm okay.

Sometimes it's hard to trust my hair to lock on its own. I see approximately 10 baby locks, which are tangled either at or close to the ends of the hair. The rest of my hair looks like it normally does when I wear a wash and go. I just can't see yet how the rest of my hair is going to group together. And I get tempted, remembering starting my hair with braids or twists. At least then I had control, and I could imagine how my hair would develop. *sigh* PATIENCE.

I was babysitting a 4 year old for a friend of mine this Thursday. During that day, we had the following conversation.

"Why do you wear your hair like that?" she asked me.

"Because I like it," I told her.

"Well, you should wear your hair in braids."

No, I was not offended by what she said. After all, she is only 4, and it's just a hairstyle she hasn't seen before. The funny thing is, a few years ago I would have been very upset by her simple statement.