No more hair albums (for now)

Well, I think I will be okay. Today I was feeling around my hair, and feeling like I wanted to take them out. Later, after I read some of my old thoughts about why I wanted to lock my hair in this way, and also remembering that I don't want to take them aloose just to redo them with braids (or anything else), I felt a little better about them. Now I don't want to take out my hair.

But what triggered the want to take them out in the first place? Actually, I know what it was. I was on Nappturality, and I saw a few people's hair albums. They were cultivated locks, of course. And I was comparing their beautiful locks to my hair, and my hair was not measuring up. I NEED TO STOP LOOKING AT HAIR ALBUMS IN THIS STAGE IN THE GAME. For me, they make me feel inadequate. So, until I can see the beauty of my own hair, I will not be looking at other hair albums.

Why is this so hard, this letting go? Letting my hair do what it does naturally is much more difficult than I thought it would be.

To my higher self: Let me be open to what my lock journey will teach me. Let me be patient, and not give up.